Inspiring people in my house!!!

When I am down with my official issues. I do not have to look for people from outside to encourage me or pick me up and say "You will Win". I have lovely inspiring people at my home itself, where I can go back and lay my head on their shoulders and say, "I don't know, but I feel lost". These people are my own parents, my parent-in-laws (coz they are equal to my parents), and my husband. They have seen the moody me, upset me, failed me, lost me, crying me and what not. But, they never get annoyed or ignore me, they make me feel, I have them as a reason to fight back. 

These people play a vital role in my everyday life from the time I was born, went to school, college, got married, a wife, now a mother, a parent and of course many more... 

A women becomes stronger than ever when she becomes a "Mother".

I heard the above in the movie trailer "Mary Kom", and I loved it. Yes, I am experiencing that every bit of the moment as a "Mother". The word is something which is filled with love, care, tears, blessings, strength, motivation, encouragement, positive approach, courage, power and most importantly godliness. I truly believe this, "God made Mothers, because he cannot be everywhere". My Mother and my mother-in-law, were, are and will be the the best moms and I am learning from them.

First, my Mom, Vimala Augustine, damn strong lady but fears God and is very pious. She has spent most of her life as a Teacher and I was also a student in her class. She loves discipline and cannot control if she sees us lazy. I did not understand this when I was a young girl. But, that has taught me to be disciplined. After we were back from school, we used to see a house well organised and some or the other snack ready in a hot-pack. For her my brother and me were everything. We can share all kinds of talk with her. She was, is and will be a strong support to my Dad financially and mentally. 

The day when I really experienced and saw the real side of my Mom was when my dad had  temporary memory loss in the year 2004. She did everything for him and took care of him like a baby. At odd hours he would wake up and question her. But, she had patience all the way to bring him back as we wanted him to be. After this, in the year 2013, my dad went through a heart bypass surgery. When I heard about the surgery, I cried almost all the time. But, she was strong like a pillar and again took care of him like never before. She has never said a no to any kind of help when asked for. She is not just a mom to my brother and me but a friend. She is not well versed with technology but she can pray to God and make miracles happen. She is the reason for what all we are and not just a life partner but a soul to my Dad.

Secondly, My Mother-in-Law, Vanaja Kesavan, she is another strong women who is impeccably good with cooking, managing home, support to my father-in-law and of-course loves us all unconditionally. The care and concern she has for her grand children will make one feel amazed. She is not highly educated, but she can talk about any of the current affairs equally. She loves cricket and when India plays, she is one lady who wont see the live match, but the highlights, only if India wins. She reads the daily newspaper and updates me with all the good, sad, bad news across the world. You can let her know how to operate a mobile or laptop once, and she does it from next-time without any guidance. If you guff-up in the cooking, do not worry, she will let you know how to correct it and present a dish flawless. She is 65+ years old, but an awesome company to talk. She made me win a gift voucher in my office for a "Potluck Competition". 

Her planning for the festivals keeps us all speechless. The lovely food items she can make with-in 2 hours will make one drop their jaws and drool. Her ladoos are are talked about in every other house who have tasted it. She knows what they like in food and that is what you find in their plates. Any time of the day you enter my home, and just tell her you are hungry, she will just take 10 minutes and server you a finger licking snack or food. You will never leave my house feeling hungry. 

I call her "Amma", as I call my mom. I don't differentiate between them at all. Similarly, she calls me as her 3rd daughter (she already has 2 daughters). I learnt from my husband, that both these lovely ladies were full of tears in their eyes and prayers in their lips, when I was going through a surgery to deliver my son. 

Next is my dad, Augustine Anbananthan. He is my first Hero. I cant take a single word against him. For him, I am the princess and he will fight the world if he sees me crying and sad. He has fought all kinds of negativity in his life. He has fought all kinds of health issues from migraine head-aces to heart issues. He taught me, not to compare between two people, everybody is unique and wanted me to be the unique person. In the beginning, people wont like you, but when you start spreading your wings and and making a difference people will understand that you are the best. 

When I got married, he told me the 3 mantras for a happy life, " If you both have a difference of opinion, talk among yourself and never involve a third person.  The moment you face the world, you both should always portray yourself as an ideal couple. Every husband and wife have fights, these fights are to make the bond stronger by solving between yourselves. If you involve a third person, the bond will be week and the first things that affects your marriage is "Trust", "Never carry your anger to the next day" and "Never fight in front of your kids".

Now for my father-in-law, R. Kesavan, a very soft, calm, gentle and a caring person. I have always thought that men are dominating and loud characters. He is a different kind of a person, a sober person on whom you will never get angry but feel very supportive. He will always greet you with a pleasant smile. With my 4+ years of marriage, I have never seen him loosing his temper. Very innocent person, who will ask you many questions, as he is not good with technology i.e. mobile, laptop, tab, sometimes TV, and you cannot ignore him at all. Anytime of the day you ask for a tea or coffee, he will serve you with loads of love; and your coffee or tea will taste heavenly.

He will give hopes and encouragement whenever you need it. He has a wonderful listening skill. If you have a problem and share with him. He remembers that, will ask you after some days if that is solved or not. He is a simple man with no expectations but loads of care for his loved ones.

Lastly, my heart-throb, Ganesh, he is one man whom I love unconditionally and feel my life complete. A loud character, but a soft spoken person, wise thoughts, but witty in his words. He is a perfect marital personality. He can do house chores like nobody else. He knows from cleaning to dusting to arranging the house. You enter my house any time of the day, and you find a house well-arranged and everything neat and clean. As any other man, he loves watching TV, play loud music, read newspaper or to be left alone with his laptop. But, if you need any kind of help in the kitchen, just give him a voice and give him proper instructions, and he becomes your third hand. He never says a no when asked for a help. A highly responsible person, understanding all his commitments in life. Everyone is equal in his eyes, let it be his parents, my parents, his sisters, his niece & nephew, my son and me. His love towards us is never less and wants us to be beside him always.

These people were the ones who had given me all kinds of courage and strength, when I had lost my hopes to become a mom and found myself to be a failure. These people not only prayed for me, but made me fight and live as I wanted to. None of them had even thought otherwise. I was a baby to them all. My life is blessed with such wonderful souls around me, I could not have asked for more.

To make us all smile, rejoice and feel blessed is what I have got from the Almighty, my son, "Nitin alias Fruity". 

Love and care for everybody around you, everyone is fighting a difficult battle. :-)

The unseen side of ME!!!

“Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.” 

I had started from office to home in a bad temper. Major reason being it was 7:30 PM, as I always want to be home early so as to spend a fruitful time with my Fruity (my son alias Nitin). Secondly, the traffic on the road was still delaying my entrance to home.

I drive a bike, Honda Activa, with full safety; helmet & jerkin. Being a 10 minutes drive from home to office, I prefer taking the simple main roads and not the short-cuts. As short-cuts in Chennai sometimes really irritate you; either the roads are bad or you have some or the other localities gathered and blocking half the way in name of some function. Main roads are loaded with vehicles in all sizes at the peak hours, from 6 PM to 9 PM, as that's the time people head back to their nests after a day long work pressure. For me it is just 5 minutes on the main road, and then I enter the locality where I stay.

Now coming back to the main subject, I was on this full fledged vehicle blocked road where I was waiting for the vehicles to start moving so that I can give accelerator to my Activa and head home and take my little baby in my arms. I could sense someone staring at me. I turned to my right and saw a guy on a Pulser, who would be between 24 to 26 years. He did not even wear a helmet and was giving me dirty looks. First I just ignored, and looked straight to see if there was some movement happening. But, this guy was just not taking his eyes off me and started looking at me from top to bottom. This ignited my brain instantly and I just lifted my helmet glasses and asked him with full anger "What??". He still did not take efforts to look away. For a second, I felt that I should not create an issue on road and just ignore and head home. But, my inner voice, did not stop and made me yell at the top of my voice "Aaaiii". There was another lady on my left in her Scooty asking what happened, I ignored her and didn't take my eyes off this horrible boy who was about to get beaten from me. Just then, the vehicles started moving slowly and he tried moving a bit faster than me. But I gave a full throttle on my bike and stopped it in front of him blocking his way. I had put the side stand in my bike and was about to get down. He immediately said, "Sorry Madam, Sorry Madam! Leave me madam." With all anger and frustration, I said "Just get out of this place and don't look here and there". He went off and I drove home with some goosebumps.

In my mind & heart, I was happy that, I raised my voice for a small but an important situation. I have never done this before. After reading & listening to so many cases of rape and eve teasing, I always felt these stupid people have to be taught a lesson. They think, we are weak and if they tease us, we will just ignore and go. NO, the answer is a big NO. We will shout, we will retaliate as this place is for female also.

The first thing to call you as a "MAN" will be only if you start respecting "Women".

There would not have been any harm if I had not even shouted. But, this has taught him a lesson, he would fear to look at random ladies and will be careful from next time.

I strongly believe, that, every women should use the "Freedom of speech". In a public place, if you see any eve teasing or if this happens to you. Please do not ignore and leave the place, shout, yell and ask for help. These kind of goons have to be taught a lesson. Lets make this country a safe place for our kids. As women, we should not hide or run away. We need to defend ourselves.

I just hope and pray none of the girls get in any of these situation ever in their life.

Be the Power! Cheers... :-)

Then a Stranger…. Now my Soul-mate!!! (Happy Beginning)

It took some time for me to actually realise what he said and respond to it. My face became pale and I was not able to think or react. I froze. My jaws were open and could not even blink my eyes. In my head, again so many questions came up. What is happening? Did I hear him correct? Is he serious? I think he is just checking me. What should I answer? What do usually the actresses answer when such questions are asked by actors? Did he really say that? Is he proposing me? Why did he propose me so un-romantically?

He asked looking at me smiling, as if he is proposing me, “Jane, what are you thinking? You don’t want to?” I swallowed the lump in my mouth and said, “I don’t know, I need to ask my dad”. And I walked off.

I kept thinking, why did I say this? Ask Dad? What made me say that?

Next morning was as usual, he came up with a smile and greeted m “Hi”. I said “Hi” and continued with my work. We spoke all official things and ended the day.

Months went by with same official stuff, clubbed up with a couple of “sorries here and there” and “I did not mean to hurt you” days passed by.

One fine day he came up next to me and said, “I have resigned, and I will leave in a months’ time. I would be travelling abroad.” I eyes wide open and could not realise that I will be missing this smart, tall, dark, handsome, funny guy.

On his last working date in HP, I was upset the whole day and could not control my tears. Ganesh was my love. I will not be able to concentrate on my work. What am I going to do? Farewell time, all spoke wonderful words, but I was only left with tears. He knew I love him, he knew I will miss him, but he has to move on.

He went for his first abroad trip. I was left alone with his memories and waiting to see if he calls me in his busy trip. Yes he did one day and I was on cloud nine, after talking to him for even 5 minutes.

After 3 months, he came to Chennai with a surprise and made plans to meet my parents directly to let them know that we want to spend the rest of our lives together as the “Man & Wife”. My parents are the best parents and very supportive of whatever decisions we take. They agreed and also met his parents. All went on fine!

He is a Hindu-Marathi & I am Tamil-Roman Catholic, we expected huge amount of drama at both places. But, the compromise was huge from both sides to make sure their kids are happily married.

I was finally in the arms of my “LOVE”. The only and the best person, who understands me totally. I can be myself to him. Ganesh is one person after my parents and brother who has seen me angry, sad, happy, moody, crying, depressed and what not. He is one person who I know will never leave me. When I shed tears he catches them and turns them into pearls and diamonds. What more would I ask from this lovely life of mine.

The name “Ganesh” is the LORD, son of the creator of earth “Shiva”. In every hindu family, lord Ganesha is worshipped before any good things.

I worship my husband, my soul-mate, with whom I began this journey as a Married lady!!!

I feel special and blessed when people address me as ‘Mrs. Jane Ganesh’ 

Then a Stranger…. Now my Soul-mate!!! (Part-3)

The as usual smile with a “Hi” was his greeting for me in office. I was totally confused and had too many questions running in my mind. He was absolutely normal as if nothing had happened. I ordered my heart to stop bothering my mind and got back to meet my daily targets.

Months and weeks passed by, he was the same Mr Smart and the fun loving guy. He was admired and liked by all in the team. His wit and the timing dialogues used to make us burst out with laughter. We thought he never had problems. He was the most happening team member. My love towards him grew more than expected. We used to talk so much on weekends that we had to switch to CUG plan in our mobile. Between us, he was the listener. I used to tell him everything I did from the time I woke. The bonding between us was so strong and well-built that we could convey messages even when we are silent or with our eyes. I used to pray to my God, that he is the one with whom I want to spend the rest of my life. We understood even the fake coughing or the sound made while clearing our thought.

On the eve of Valentine, we were asked to choose our pair and come dressed up in either green or red colour. We both obviously saw each other and paired up. But the dress code was something he didn’t like and said he is not ready for that. I kept my hopes high and said that we should come in Green.

Valentine’s Day I entered office early to just make sure I am there in my green dress and seeing so many lovely pairs with red or green. My heart started thumping as I heard Ganesh’s voice coming near the cubicles where we sit, and to my surprise and happiness he was in a green shirt, with his smart looks. The smile and the way he greeted made me feel a though he had blown a magic spell on me to just keep looking at him. He came near me stretching his hands to shake hands. He did say something, but I could not hear, as I was only admiring him. In the filmy effect, I saw angels dancing around me and both of us floating on the clouds. He suddenly called me again and said, “Jane, Happy Valentine’s Day. I came in Green”.

I was blushing and just couldn’t stop my smile. I just wished, “I want to spend the rest of my Life with you”. He was different than the other days. I took a chance to talk to him when he was in the cafeteria and noticed his eyes. He was sparkling with love for me. The smile became soft and more welcoming, and he said “I need to talk to you, let’s meet in the evening”. I started of dreaming the special and a romantic proposal he would be making to me. All the proposal scenes of Shah Rukh, Aamir, Salman, Madhavan filled my mind. And I was mentally prepared.

In the evening, he was in the reception reading the newspaper; I sat beside him on the couch smiling, to check what he was reading. He saw me and said folding the newspaper, “Jane, you know what, let’s get married!!! What do you say?”

Then a Stranger…. Now my Soul-mate!!! (Part-2)

After some weeks, our group of friends had a plan to meet in the Besant Nagar beach. And to my surprise, Ganesh & his friends were also there. From my group, one of the girl had fallen for Ganesh and this we got to know on that day. But, I did not really bother as I thought, they might get to-get-her and left for my home as usual after enjoying in the beach.
Weeks passed by, with usual talks, chats, bye-byes and smiling to each other as colleagues. On the day when we were to get split as different teams, the announcement was done, that I will be with him. I was happy about this and started our work together. While the seat arrangements were done, he had asked my TL to place us next to each other and I was totally unaware of this. When I saw the arrangement, I was over-whelmed and yes the butterflies did sputter inside me. Working with him was fun and full of learning, as Mr. Smart was there to hold my fingers and teach me how to take each and every step. We were friends forever. We started enjoying each other’s company. Started feeling comfortable and were able to achieve our targets. I became very comfortable with the process and also a member in his friends group. But, little did we learn that we were actually in love.
One Sunday, I did not call him and did not even send him a message, purely due to weekend chores. This is when I was able to realize that I missed him. Felt empty without him and this is nothing but “Love”. The feeling and the phase that I really wanted to live in my life. My dream-man was him, Ganesh. He was the person who will complete me… I longed to talk to him, and whenever my phone beeped or started ringing, I jumped to check who it was. Finally, in the evening he called me, I was expecting a warm greeting. Instead, he yelled at me asking why I didn’t give him a call or message him the whole day. He was waiting for my call and why did I do this? Instantly I was full of tears, and that made him angry further more. Slowly the apologies from both ends started and the anger turned into laughter and tears into shy smiles and blushing.
I knew that the cupid had hit me. Wondered what happened with the cupid on his side. Was the cupid still looking for the right time? Was he trying to hide his feelings to me? Was he normal and only I am over reacting? But, in movies I saw the boys feel the love first and run behind the girl to express their love. What is wrong with him? Why is he not saying? Is it that, I am imagining too much and too much filmy? Was this how the Chennai boys were? All these questions ruined my night’s sleep and left me with no answers.
Next day, I was not quite interested to go to office, first reason being Monday blues (Sunday night without proper sleep) and confused with my cupid attack. Something, in my mind couldn’t stop loving him.

Girls don’t think from the brain, we think from heart!!!

Then a Stranger…. Now my Soul-mate!!! (Part-1)

“A woman knows the face of the man she loves as a sailor knows the open sea.”
– Honore de Balzac

As said in movies and books… I still remember the way we met with no idea of what is in store for us.

College campus recruited, and placed in HP (Hewlett Packard) with Human Resources – Operations.

In the training room, with freshers and experienced people, feeling nervous, anxious and of course excited about the New Phase in my Life. I was in the second last row with my friends. Being fresh out of college, smiling, giggling, sparkling eyes looking around the room and feeling proud to be associated with this lovely organization.

While looking around and paying attention to the Training, witnessed a tall, dark, handsome guy, asking so many smart questions and answering all the questions asked by the Trainer. I was surprised, and his friends around him appreciating him for the answers. I did not know his name, but only knew that he was the smartest person in the class and I want to be like him. Everyday, witnessing his smart, bold and intelligent character, we friends used to talk about him in the lunch break. 

Suddenly one day, I received a friend request in the internal chat “Ganesh Kesavan would like to add you”. I was surprised, and looked for who this person was. Suddenly this smart guy called me and said “Jane, I am Ganesh and I have sent you the request, add me”. With my heart beating so loud that it could be heard to the next classroom, and my mouth wide open, I accepted the request. This was overheard by my friend beside me, and she started teasing me. I just said, he is so senior and this will the best way we can learn and understand the training better. She agreed. 

We used to chat the normal common stuffs, “Hi”, “How are you?”, “What you had for lunch?”, etc. In the evening while waiting for my bus in the bus stop, I used to see him walk with his group of friends and just wave a bye-bye to me. My heart used to sink and bring smile to my face making it bright like the morning sunlight. I loved this feeling and was happy. I never knew this was something which is called “LOVE”. One day he pinged me in the chat and said, “I want to meet you after the lunch. Please wait outside the Training room. Come soon after your lunch”. I was surprised and did not know how to react, and just said “OK”. Yes we did meet outside the Training Room. But, before we could talk anything, he got a call in his mobile and he went off. I came inside the room and the day went as usual.